Friday, March 11, 2005

Water and the God Itch

Little Buttercup has developed a serious water fixation, or a "Waloo! fixation," as she would say, if she could say "fixation." Not only will she drop almost any endeavor or cease any tantrum at the slightest mention of taking a bap ("Bap? Bap! Bap! Bap!," she says like a crackhead scouring the floorboards of his car for that vial that surely must be there), but now her favorite toy is the kitchen sink. Last week, JC pulled the little step stool up to the sink and let her play with not-Tupperware under a trickle of water from the faucet. Give him a break - the kitchen was filthy and, despite my apparent theory, it wasn't going to clean itself. Letting her play in the water was the only way he could get anything done in there. Since then, playing in the sink is all she wants to do. She won't even finish her breakfast anymore before looking me squarely in the eye and speaking very slowly but insistently (because I am an idiot, you understand) and telling me, "Ollie stool! Ollie waloo! Ollie stool, waloo, cup!" So I take off her shirt, hand her a couple of not-Tupperware containers and open the tap a little. What am I supposed to do? But there is a worse development. We can no longer go to our favorite park in the afternoon because, along with two swingsets, toddler-perfect assortment of teeter-totters and horseys, two amazing play areas with slides and climbing apparati, and one of those merry-go-round child launchers, there is a water fountain. On our last two trips to the park, the water fountain is the only thing she is remotely interested in climbing. So we'll have to find another park. I've had a toddler before, so I know that these phases come and go and shouldn't be given too much thought. My only fear is that this early fascination with water might indicate the beginning of a lifelong path. LONDON, OR POSSIBLY GOD, CALLING Last year, in the midst of all my traumas, I knew that I was being called to something. I also knew that a person doesn't make big decisions like that in the midst of traumas, so I've waited and watched. First, let me say that I know beyond any doubt that I am in EXACTLY the right place for right now. My energy goes into things that feed my soul: My children, my husband, my friends, my church, my writing. At the same time, I feel that this time now is preparation for something later. It has occurred to me that, one day in the future, maybe it will be my lot to attend seminary and seek ordination in some fashion. I have floated this past a couple of people - people who are very close to me and who know the path to and role of clergyhood. In my fantasy, when I brought the idea up, they would say something like, "Of course! That makes perfect sense! We've all known that you'd do that some day." That is not what they said. Basically, they said, "Well, it's good to say it out loud." So I start to wonder, if I were called to ordination, wouldn't it be more obvious to someone other than myself?


Blogger Marie said...

Oh my goodness!!!! Elvis Costello???? Maybe called to the priesthood but all anyone said was "it's good to say it out loud"? The Junkman's Daughter? Are you my twin sister?

3:35 PM  
Blogger PPB said...

It's good to say it out loud? What, like it's alcoholism? Sigh.
You're asking the wrong people. A lot of people are so wierded out by the idea of getting in too close with God and they just don't know what to say.

7:40 AM  

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